Be sure to wear a flower in your hair

The guy next to me on the Muni (and by "next to", I mean literally sharing skin cells, because holy crap it was crowded) was trying to reassure all of us that being wedged between masses of strangers on a nasty train in a crowded city isn't that bad, because in Japan they use brooms to actually push people into every little crevice between the walls of flesh on their trains. I don't know about that...but I DID find this, which is equally disaster/lawsuit-waiting-to-happen:


Also, while clutching my sides and eating cereal and watching this (Happy Mother's Day!) with Milo while waiting for Nolan, at one point we heard this howling and thundering outside. After ascertaining that the wind almost blew our house down, Milo and I just stopped and looked at each other, and I'm fairly certain that our souls connected on a profound level in that moment, which was, "what the HELL is wrong with the weather here." Next time I feel like he and I are sharing thoughts, I will find that chick from Freaky Friday and ask her if she has any fortune cookies left, and how much are they please, because I would LOVE to be Milo for a day.

Day # : too many

For someone who literally never gets sick, having Salmonella AND whatever-this-thing-is within a month period is a little harsh. Looks like my awesome immune system is like one of those 6-year-old kids at a swim meet who grabs onto the lane-line, panting, while their mother screams frantically at the other end to "keep going! it's only one lap!!!". Also, my nose is so chafed from wiping it, that whenever I stare at something head-on, I get distracted by pieces of dead skin sticking off of it. Gross.

Good news is, my abs are going to be fantastic from all this coughing.

Nolan's been very busy lately delivering babies (hooah!), so we've had to make due with leaving notes and sending texts to make sure the other is still alive. I remember him getting up at 4:30am a couple days ago, and I *think* kissing my head before he left, but it could have been a hallucination because let's face it, I'm not in my right mind anyway while drowsy (Holla, villains!), and that not counting the sick factor. I think that was the last time I saw him.

Milo has also been less affectionate of late, and I'm starting to think it's because he's been reading the Swine Flu updates on CNN while we're gone, and is getting suspicious...

turd.

I know I get kind of desperate around Halloween, but seriously, I hope those creative juices flow at least once before October, or I could end up like this:

Forever immortalized as poo...poor thing.

I know I didn't post on Friday, per usuale, so for you OCD people, I'm sorry I threw off your rhythm. You have no idea how hard it would have been to type with a huge chunk of my thumb missing. Because I cut it off with scissors while trying to shred a credit card. After soaking through three band-aids, my doctor-husband's response last night was, "Hmm. That's definitely the muscle you can see poking through there. Too bad it's too late to get stitches." THANKS, babe. The encouragement is stifling.

Sometimes I will get little treasures like this from a coworker in my inbox:

...which is cute, but c'mon now.
(ps - N, see that picture? that one right there? THAT is what I want for my birthday.)

Weekends when I am up for singing at Cornerstone are draining, and man if I didn't have my buddy Starbucks in one corner and of course the nasty-smelling but fantastically-effective Caudalie spray, I wouldn't make it through today. Really, no matter how nice I'm sure Mary Engelbreit is, I don't want her essence pervading my pores...and that's probably why it wakes me up. "what? quilting? dust? redheaded children?"

As promised...

Right now I am just hoping everyone is technically adept enough to follow the link here, and it makes me nervous like last year when I started blogging regularly again and felt like I was shouting to the empty halls. Ahh, sweet anxiety.

As promised (and I feel like I have built these up to be really cool, when in actuality they are kind of lame), here are your festive pictures of Milo in his Santa suit, and even one of our little Charlie Brown tree that we picked out:

Okay, about the tree: I KNOW. But it was only $5 and we live in an economic toilet bowl. What are you gonna do.

By the time I get home tonight, my Christmas shopping will be completely done, and I am pretty sure that is some kind of a record. It significantly helps to have wish lists from every relative.

Last night I tried to cut the eggnog fudge to bring to work (I had this vision in my head of me prancing around the office distributing holiday cheer and love in baskets to people I think), and...it melted all over my hand. Kind of/exactly like this. So I did what any self-respecting woman does in such a situation: I called my mother...who promptly told me to trash it and start over. Despite my conscience telling me that I am a terrible person for throwing away a whole pan full of edible (albeit soupy) fudge, I am happy that at LEAST my slaving away paid off and we now get to have tasty and rock-hard eggnog fudge at work today.